Diana

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"Diana" the man called out for the third time. The name prompted me to look around to see 'Di' .

I instantly had an image of a beautiful face and an exceptional grace. When I looked around, I saw Diana who didn't quite look like that. She had a grumpy face and had her hands and legs quite dirtied. She seemed disinterested while she sat. The man seemed to encourage her to clap hands and was trying to converse. Diana just looked away. From her face, she seemed to be bored. I studied her hands and feet. They looked worn out. There seemed to be a certain melancholy in her face. She climbed up to a high raise window and looked out. From where I stood, I could get a fair idea of what the window overlooked. She sat there looking longingly and gazed through the window. I wondered what was going on in her mind. She probably liked what she saw as she opened her mouth a little and continued looking. She looked like she yearned to be out there, just for her feet to touch the soft grass and roll over or just take a deep breathe in the open. She perhaps missed the touch of the rough edges of trees, or she just imagined doing all that sitting there. She suddenly turned to where we stood and jumped towards us. She opened her mouth to show off her uneven teeth line and looked at us. She looked like she hated us as she let her face in lots of contortions.

Why would she hate us? - this question reeled in my head a million times and I looked at her questioningly.We seemed to have a telepathic conversation as she just stood there and watched me now calmly."I hate you because I am jealous"- she seemed to say. "Why would you be jealous of me?" I wondered. I never imagined till then that I had something exceptional that someone could be jealous about. The thought did rejoice me but the thought it could make Di jealous didn't quite go down well. "Well, because you are free and I am not!"I couldn't believe what I heard in my heart. My heart was pounding and repeated the sentence a million times.

Yes 'freedom' is every species birth right. When 'freedom' is taken away from a living creature, it is as good as killing it because what good is its life if there is no freedom. Perhaps that is why convicts are put in jail. The activity is restricted and monotony sets in. What life is it to be restricted to an area and jailed there for good. Well, Di, the gorilla, was perhaps thinking of just that which I could read in her eyes and heart. She looked longingly at my son. Perhaps she remembered her family. Why was she so sad? Was she away from her family? Did she have a companion? Did she have babies? A million questions arose in my mind. But Di looked at us. A glass barrier separated us from her and she came and pressed her face against the glass. I pressed mine and she seemed to touch. She looked on. I couldn't help feel the sadness in her. Oh! Lord! if only she could be let free in the open forest with other Gorillas. Why would man get a gorilla and lock her up and create something that he thinks she would like and convince himself that she is liking it there? How can man tell what she wants to eat or what environment she wants to live. The chain which hung high up there, she uses to jump, is the man's idea of giving her freedom to jump. But, perhaps she doesn't like it or perhaps she feels that its OK. Either way, nobody will ever know. But, there in captivity she wakes up everyday to the same set of chains hanging down and looking at millions of people who mock at her or eat delicious ice cream while all she can do is just watch and long to be out there. While all the thoughts surrounded me, she let out her hand and pressed it against the glass. I pressed mine and she looked on. From her look, I could tell that all she wanted was to perhaps touch me and feel and not harm. I wondered why would anyone think she could be harmful. Well, I hadn't done anything but just look at her lovingly and the love I saw in her eyes was immense. I let out a small prayer. I prayed for her good. I prayed that she could at least get to eat what she wants, and ,someday by some miracle she will join her family. It almost seemed impossible for my prayers to come true. But, God has his mysterious ways and I am hoping for a miracle to happen.

(Diana is in Dubai zoo sharing her space with another companion!)

copyright © 2005

My first Blog

This is my first blogging experience. A myraid of feelings creep in... is it cool? Or is it dangerous? Are we being foolish about being open with all our emotions with strangers? Will we do the same if we had to stand in front of a large audience in a hall and talk about our "feelings" and "day to day happenings"... Absolutely not. But then why is the blog different? Is it because we feel (incorrectly ofcourse) that we can be anonymous?

Not sure... But who am i to stand in the way of the "blogging wave" thats sweeping this world.

So, i jump into the bandwagon!

Dont say i did not warn you... i could just be blogging and blogging and blogging......

But again, would i??